Couples Counseling

In committed relationships, challenges are bound to arise, often from a mix of stress and events that can become overwhelming. Disappointment, hurt, blame, and withdrawal are common themes in these struggles. Fear and anger often take centre stage, overshadowing any hope for a brighter future.

Enter couples counselling—a sanctuary where partners find a haven to engage in open, honest, and heartfelt dialogue, delving into the depths of their emotions with unwavering compassion. In this transformative process, the veils obscuring the genuine issues are lifted, allowing for identification, understanding, and, ultimately, purposeful resolution.

Welcome to couples therapy where...

I use the Gottman Method for my couples; click here to learn more about this method.

If you want to know what to expect in these sessions, click here.

Common couples counselling concerns

• Poor communication

• Constant conflict

• Breach of trust

• Chronic arguing and fighting

• Loss of intimacy (emotional and/or sexual)

• Infidelity (emotional and/or sexual)

• Outside intrusion (in-laws, former spouses/partners, others)

• Health or legal crisis

• Polygamy

• Substance abuse

• Transition from one life stage to another (births, relocation, new career, mid-life crisis, empty-nest, retirement)

• Blended families

What is the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy?

Embarking on the journey of Gottman Method Couples Therapy is like uncovering the secrets to a lasting and meaningful relationship. Picture Dr. John Gottman as a seasoned guide who, after studying couples for over 40 years, can predict with an impressive 94% accuracy whether a couple will stay together. This method is about understanding what makes relationships work and weaving that knowledge into your unique connection.

The therapy is like carefully examining your relationship, using research-backed strategies based on the Sound Relationship House Theory. The goals are simple but profound: improve communication, boost intimacy and affection, break down barriers that make things feel stuck, and deepen your understanding of each other.

The process starts with an assessment where you and your partner share your thoughts and feelings. The therapist then helps you determine the best session plan, deciding how often and for how long you'll meet. From there, the real work begins with interventions – like practical tools and techniques designed to strengthen three key areas: your friendship, how you handle conflicts, and the meaningful goals you share.

As you go through this process, you'll learn to replace negative patterns with positive interactions, heal past hurts, and build a stronger emotional connection. It's like crafting a quilt of closeness and understanding in your relationship. The therapy also includes strategies to ensure positive changes stick around so your relationship can keep growing and thriving.

LEARN

What is it good for?

Roles in the relationship

Unequal distribution or oversight of roles within a relationship can give rise to accumulated tension and discontent.

In couples counselling, my approach centres on a comprehensive exploration of each party's perceptions and considerations concerning various roles, discerning the nuanced impact on the overarching dynamics of the relationship.

Beliefs and values

Rooted in childhood and past experiences, individuals' beliefs and values can diverge within a relationship, potentially leading to miscommunication.

Collaborating with me as their therapist, couples engage in a process aimed at gaining a nuanced understanding of each other's belief systems and values, fostering clarity and alignment within the relationship.

Improved Communication Skills

Effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. The Gottman Method teaches couples practical skills to express themselves clearly and empathetically.

In couples counselling using the Gottman method, the couples learn to foster open and honest communication; partners can then better understand each other's perspectives, minimizing misunderstandings and enhancing overall connection.

Conflict Resolution

At the heart of fostering a healthy relationship is the constructive resolution of conflicts, a pivotal aspect addressed by the Gottman Method. This approach equips couples with tangible tools for managing disagreements in a positive manner, steering away from avoidance.

Through the application of these conflict resolution skills, couples in therapy cultivate an environment where conflicts are addressed with respect and understanding, thereby contributing significantly to the overall growth of the relationship.

Enhanced Intimacy and Connection

The Gottman Method employs strategies to deepen emotional intimacy between partners. Through exercises like the "Love Maps," couples gain insights into each other's inner worlds, fostering a stronger emotional bond.

This increased connection lays the foundation for a more fulfilling and enduring relationship.

Understanding Relationship Patterns

Couples often fall into repetitive patterns that can be detrimental to the relationship. The Gottman Method helps couples identify and comprehend these patterns.

In couples therapy, couples get to recognize the dynamics at play, and couples can then work together to break negative cycles and cultivate healthier behaviours.

Building Friendship

A strong friendship forms the bedrock of a successful relationship. The Gottman Method emphasizes the importance of maintaining affection, admiration, and shared interests between partners.

Focusing on building and nurturing this friendship contributes to the overall health and longevity of the relationship.

Individual and Shared Goal Setting

Couples collaborate to establish individual and shared goals for their relationship. This goal-setting process creates a roadmap for the future, fostering a sense of unity and purpose.

Couples are encouraged to articulate their aspirations, ensuring that both partners are actively invested in the relationship's growth.

Relapse Prevention

The Gottman Method recognizes the necessity of ongoing maintenance to prevent a relapse into negative relationship patterns.

Couples are guided in the development of strategies to sustain positive changes achieved through therapy. Regular check-ins help ensure continued growth and success in the relationship.

Increased Emotional Intelligence

Couples learn to recognize and manage their emotions more effectively. The Gottman Method emphasizes the development of emotional intelligence, enabling partners to navigate challenges with increased resilience.

This heightened emotional intelligence contributes to a more harmonious and understanding relationship.

Have any questions?

If you have any questions about the therapies, feel free to contact us.